EMQ » April–June 2021 » Volume 57 Issue 2
By John Smith
Much has been written on principles of discipleship, but for some time I’ve been interested to explore a prior question: What manner of life is best poised to initiate discipleship opportunities? Through thirty-five years of ministry in several different cultures and countries, my wife and I have landed on six lifestyle entry-points for opening doors into meaningful discipling relationships.[1]
Keep it Personal!
Don’t substitute programs[2] for relationships.
I begin with the head entry-point which is grounded in relationship and unfolds into the others. It is succinctly captured in Paul’s challenge to the Philippians to pursue discipleship “in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation” (2:15). In order to minister Christ to a people, we must be present. There will be no cultural engagement unless we are there, hanging out, interacting with the world outside of the church. And for most of us, cultural engagement relates to the small world we live in, the various relationships open to us, my corner of the city.[3]
Several years ago, the president of our neighborhood association requested that I attend a workshop on race for everyone who worked on behalf of the zip code that includes our neighborhood, one of the poorest in Atlanta. Through the workshop, speakers presented data and tools related to our neighborhoods, some practical and some quite complex. We sat at round tables so that we were able to get to know others. Two points stood out to me.
First, I realized that almost none of those represented there lived in our zip code. Most lived far out in the suburbs. Hmmm. The second point jumped out at the end when a facilitator asked, “What are one or two take-aways for you from this workshop?” Among other things, one brave person stood, holding up her thick notebook, and asked, “What is different about this workshop from others? Last year I attended, received my notebook, only to return to my office, put it on my shelf, and think little more about it.” Everyone squirmed.
I do not condemn that workshop or its presenters, but it came to exemplify so much in inner-city work: well-designed, well-funded programs are of little long-term benefit when not grounded in deep relationships. Many try to help people through programs and money administered from a distance so that impersonal projects substitute for messy, intensive, and personally costly relationships.
Deep relationships facilitate ministry that really fits the local context because it is created within that context. Deep relationships are important so we can model alternative lifestyles, alternative ways of responding to problems in our world, ways that are informed and guided by the gospel.
Why might we prefer programs to relationships? Programs are much more efficient because one size fits all. Programs can be easier because they are more tangible, more measurable, better for raising funds. Programs can also feel safer because they do not necessarily require self-exposure or disclosure. In contrast, relationships can be high risk. Rudolph Bultmann expresses this idea, “The community takes over Jesus’ assault on the world … – the assault which is at the same time the paradoxical form of his courtship of the world … which continually opens up for the world the possibility of faith.”[4] There is no substitute for helping people in the context of close relationships.
Join Up!
Serve in ways non-believers appreciate.
Friends wanted to reach into a large, unreached village area that was nearly impossible for them to live-in due to being foreigners. Accordingly, they looked for an entry-point for local church-planters. My friend was an engineer and the villagers needed water, so he designed a simple water catching and filtering process that could be made cheaply and in place. He then gave this technology to these church-planters so that they would have income-generating businesses that met a significant need and that involved construction alongside of their new neighbors.
In Paul’s very practical section of Romans when he lists many ways to serve others, he tucks in a recommendation to “give thought to do what is honorable in the sight of all” (12:17). It describes a deliberate mind-exercise to observe what the community values as “honorable” or lovely and useful,[5] what reflects kingdom values that unbelievers also see as good. If that valued service already exists, we can join in; otherwise we may be able to initiate it.
To fully embrace this entry-point, we may need to get over a major hesitation. We could think that the culture is so fallen and so corrupt that it is a worthless endeavor to improve it. However, because of common grace and the image of God in everyone, those who do not believe may unwittingly engage in Kingdom-building activities. All human advances that benefit the culture – medical breakthroughs, new farming techniques, politics that excel, new forms of art, exceptional charity non-profits – are worthy endeavors that we can praise and participate in.[6]
In our past in a Southeast Asian nation, the local Rotary Club gave us opportunities to spray homes for dengue fever and plant mangrove trees to prevent erosion. In our present neighborhood, everyone appreciates a project matching younger volunteers with senior neighbors during a time of COVID-19 shutdown. These have kingdom aroma. These types of services have not only given us opportunities to make new non-Christian friends but also allow them to see Christians contributing to the culture in ways they recognize.
When we join unbelievers as they inadvertently glorify God by their deeds, we can help them to taste communal Christianity before they embrace it, to see kingdom values before they enter. We can then stir up those Godward impulses in them and build a relationship of commonality that points toward God and his values. gospel-deeds done together with unbelievers can open channels for gospel-words.
Love the Weak!
Advantage the disadvantaged.
In a book probably reflecting a pre-Mosaic time, Job is presented as an exemplar of a righteous man. He had been exceptionally blessed by God and was “the greatest of all the people of the east” (1:3). It seems that at this early point, God uses Job to illustrate many basic life truths, such as how the righteous can suffer well, how Satan can interfere in human life and how God can use Satan to accomplish his greater ends. Job’s life is a glimpse into fundamental lifestyle values for God’s people. Therefore, when Job describes himself, “I delivered the poor who cried for help, and the fatherless who had none to help him. The blessing of him who was about to perish came upon me, and I caused the widow’s heart to sing for joy” (29:12,13), he reflects God’s posture and our obligation to favor the disadvantaged.
Who are the disadvantaged? While the Bible commonly cites the poor, widow, orphan, and immigrants, these are merely cultural examples that might also include under-educated, single parents, unborn, disabled, victims of disaster, oppressed minorities, inner city young black men, gravely ill, etc. These can feel left out, forgotten, missing out on the benefits that many take for granted.
A basic calling to everyone in the community of God is to give extra aid to those with less assets. The Old Testament law and prophets outline several specific steps to help the poor, as do Acts and 1 Timothy for widows. When James and John embraced Paul into ministry, they challenged him not to forget the poor (Galatians 2:10) – an impulse seen in several of Paul’s letters to collect funds for the poor of Palestine.
Moreover, not only will we be following God’s heart in caring for the disadvantaged, but such care can bring respect from the world that our faith is authentic. A part of reaching the middle class of China, for example, has included exposing Chinese friends to good work among orphans, a class who are largely hidden from view along with the mentally and physically disabled.[7] Once again, it gives a taste of Christian compassion to those who have not yet embraced Christ.
Even if our work or residence takes us to the wealthy, well-educated or upper caste, we should always keep a compassionate eye out for the deprived, whether as individuals or whole classes. We need to be intentional about reaching them, allowing room in our lives for them even though they may be outside our strategic target group. Part of discipleship of any group must involve teaching new believers to care for them as well.
Be Weak!
Build relationships through embracing our own need and depending on others.
Can personal weakness be a strategy? Paul talked about it consistently enough in the context of his own ministry for us to make that case. Nowhere is this seen more clearly that in his writings to Corinth. In those two letters, he uses his own weakness as a means to humble the proud Corinthian believers (1 Corinthians 4:10), to sharpen a rebuke (1 Corinthians 10:9,10), in sarcasm (1 Corinthians 11:21; 2 Corinthians 13:8), as a channel to receive God’s strength (2 Corinthians 12:10), but also to enter into the experience of the weak in order to reach them (1 Corinthians 9:22; 11:29).
Yet Paul did not originate this approach but learned it well from Jesus’ life and ministry: “For he was crucified in weakness, but lives by the power of God. For we also are weak in him, but in dealing with you we will live with him by the power of God” (2 Corinthians 13:4). In one example of many, Jesus embraced human weakness by requesting water from the woman at Jacob’s well, and so a fruitful relationship was born. By bathing his life and ministry in weakness, Jesus modeled the upside-down values of his kingdom in which weakness is upstream of glory, in which the cross must precede the crown.
By exposing our weaknesses to those we seek to disciple, we accomplish at least four things:
- We model the gospel with kingdom values of humility, in which the seemingly weak dies for the superficially strong (2 Corinthians 8:9).
- We honor others by acknowledging that they have something we lack. This is a particularly important aspect of relationship building in an honor-shame culture in which the receiver puts herself in the inferior position. Paul regularly gave his readers the opportunity to join his work by hospitality when he visited (1 Corinthians 16:6; 2 Corinthians 1:16; cf. Philippians 4:10–20).
- In weakness we conform to Jesus’ suffering (Philippians 3:10; 1 Peter 4:12,13).
- And in the most basic sense, when others know of our obedience in the face of weakness, we show our dependence on God (2 Corinthians 1:9). The evident weakness of the gospel messenger serves to downplay his or her role and highlight God’s.
I’m reminded of a family that moved to East Asia where there were few other English speakers. Knowing almost none of the language, they struggled for the first year just living, ordering the wrong things from restaurants, not knowing how to connect utilities or handle public transportation, etc. The lack of resources forced them to depend on local work colleagues for many basic needs, even to the point of borrowing substantial sums when their employer had difficulty working out a system to pay their salary. Yet in the long run, their struggles built lines of communication and relationship that will always benefit them.
Here are my quick guidelines for staying weak in my inner-city neighborhood (adapt these to your culture):
- Borrow tools, don’t buy them.
- Find excuses to ask others for advice or help.
- Ask others for the best places to shop for things, to go eat, to recreate.
- Ask neighbors to watch the house when away.
- Share house keys with neighbors and watch out for crime
We put ourselves at a disadvantage to allow others to advantage us. And certainly, for those from the United States, such strategic use of weakness can turn our natural can-do spirit into gospel-enhancing humility.
Mix it Up!
Make diversity a ministry strategy.
Aren’t you tired of hearing the Martin Luther King Jr. quote that “the most segregated hour of Christian America is eleven o’clock on Sunday morning”? Whether exactly true or not (I suspect three o’clock on any given morning), it is too true. How embarrassing that one of the major themes for the whole Bible of natural barriers being demolished is so commonly ignored (Galatians 3:28; Colossians 3:11).
Diverse unity not only enriches us, but it is one of our shining recommendations to the world for the reality of the Trinity and for the gospel (John 17:11, 21–23). While diversity exists in many arenas such as business, entertainment, and sports, the true measure of its reality is found in voluntary associations. When people are free to choose, the vast majority choose to be with similar people. The church and its various gatherings are voluntary associations, so when we choose diversity, we stand out.
Not only should we fight hard for unity in diversity in our church meetings,[8] but we should also find ways to take our diverse Christian fellowship out into the culture. We should strategize in how to shock people with a community that lives by different standards; Sermon on the Mount standards practiced among diverse believers. Find creative ways to mix it up – invite into your home and activities both youngsters and oldsters, Christians and non-Christians, lots of races and nationalities. Watch magic happen.
This power jumped out to me on the front porch of a neighbor. Our (diverse) church had organized an adult kickball league for our city. Each team had a small number of believers on it while the majority were from local neighborhoods. These teams were diverse in every sense that our city was diverse (OK, so I was the only elder.) After one game we pulled together a quick cook-out on a neighbor’s porch. With food and drinks, great conversation broke out. At one point a Jewish Christian was explaining the meaning of the Passover Seder to a black believer while two other black Christian friends and I were discussing their upcoming wedding that I (white) was officiating, and other neighbors were listening in. The display of diversity within the body of Christ invites those outside to taste and see true kingdom fellowship. And that was the plan.
Tim Keller captures this entry-point: “The Christian church is to be a new society in which the world can see what family life, business practices, race relations, and all aspects of life can be under the kingship of Jesus Christ.”[9] Not only will we be richer, our witness will be brighter.
Think Small!
Pursue the ordinary.
I’ve visited Palestine twice, once forty years ago and once five years ago. The differences were stark and many. One of the most pleasant was the omnipresence of drip irrigation that has turned a desert into gardens of flowers and lush landscaping. Israeli irrigation techniques are imitated around the world.
Big outputs can come from small inputs. Western culture has sold us on the big, the radical, the cutting edge, the transformative. We want to be passionate leaders who make a difference. What place do the small and normal have? Actually, most relationships that are real and lasting flow out of the mundanity that occupies the bulk of our lives, more so than the huge and exciting.
In his bottoms-up kingdom, Jesus commends the normal when He affirms that it is the faithful in the small who are entrusted with the big (Luke 16:10). In her blog called The Well, Anglican priest, Tish Harrison Warren, speaks of the “bravery it takes to believe that a small life is still a meaningful life, and the grace to know that even when I’ve done nothing that is powerful or bold or even interesting that the Lord notices me and is fond of me and that that is enough.” This applies to every area of life including outreach.[10]
It was only after years of weekly attendance in a Rotary Club in the Philippines and supporting projects, that the president requested a home Bible study from us. In our present neighborhood, the essential ordinary includes walking the dog, showing up for street clean-ups and being present at monthly porch parties. In his book, Ordinary, Michael Horton’s writes, “Loving actual neighbors through particular actions every day can be a lot more mundane as well as difficult than trying to transform culture,”[11] and more effective.
By definition, few of us are big leaders. Most of us should not look for dramatic works of greatness, preaching before great crowds, starting huge non-profits, getting into big projects and big causes. Life is comprised of the commitment to doing the same small things; working and reaching out and talking and studying and waking up the next day to do it all over again, day after week after month after year, with results few and far-between. Like dollar-cost averaging in investing or like drip-irrigation in agriculture, a bottoms-up Christian can celebrate small.
Dr. John Smith (pseudonym) ThM Grace Theological Seminary, DMin, Westminster Theological Seminar, has been a member of Crossworld since 1985. He worked in Philippines, North Africa, and East Asia, as well as served in executive leadership of Crossworld for fourteen years. He is now living in inner city Atlanta while working with internationals.
NOTES
[1] Each of these is directly grounded in the fundamental doctrine that we all are created in God’s image as innately relational beings even as God lives in dynamic trinitarian relationships.
[2] Programs of discipleship are certainly very helpful, particularly if they have been designed with the local audience in view. But those programs should be used in relationally-rich environments in order for them to be modeled and personalized.
[3] One of the key considerations for choosing a good vocational ministry platform should be how much it leads us into relationships among those we want to reach.
[4] The Gospel of John a Commentary, Wipf & Stock Publishers (August 15, 2014, original 1856), 510, based on John 17.
[5] kaloj. Cf. 2 Cor 8:21 for the same principle – “we aim at what is honorable not only in the Lord’s sight but also in the sight of man.”
[6] Tim Keller quotes Isaiah 28 to this effect: “When a farmer plows for planting … when he has leveled the surface … does he not plant wheat in its place, barley in its plot, and spelt in its field? His God instructs him and teaches him the right way … Grain must be ground to make bread … all this also comes from the Lord Almighty, wonderful in counsel and magnificent in wisdom.” Keller adds, “What appears as a discovery (the proper season and conditions for sowing, farm management, rotation of crops, etc.) is actually the Creator opening his book of creation and revealing his truth.” (Gospel in Life, https://gospelinlife.com).
[7] During a recent ministry stint in this country, we heard people commenting they had never given thought to what happens to such people and were unaware of how many there were.
[8] Church history tells us that even culturally homogenous Christian communities don’t have a great track-record when it comes to unity.
[9] Timothy J. Keller, Ministries of Mercy: The Call of the Jericho Road, 2nd ed. (Phillipsburg, NJ: P&R), 54.
[10] For many bi-vocational workers the small and mundane includes daily excellence in the routine of a job.
[11] The complete title is Ordinary: Sustainable Faith in a Radical, Restless World, Zondervan (2014) 161.
EMQ, Volume 57, Issue 2. Copyright © 2021 by Missio Nexus. All rights reserved. Not to be reproduced or copied in any form without written permission from Missio Nexus. Email: EMQ@MissioNexus.org.
